The Couples Reset
Stop having the same fight over and over again—or get on the same page before a big new chapter.
Couples don’t only come to therapy because something is wrong.
Sometimes you love each other and know you want to build a life together, but you want to be more intentional about how you do it. Maybe you're getting married, thinking about having a baby, or preparing for another major transition.
Other times, you've been together for years and have gotten stuck. A small disagreement turns into the same argument you've had a hundred times. One person pushes for connection while the other pulls away. You both leave feeling misunderstood, defensive, or disconnected—and eventually you start wondering, How did we get here?
The Couples Reset is my structured, active approach to couples therapy. Whether you're trying to strengthen an already healthy relationship or change patterns that aren't working anymore, we'll focus on understanding each other better and learning how to navigate your relationship differently.
A different way of doing couples therapy
I don't believe couples therapy should be a place where you have the same argument you've been having at home—only now with a therapist watching.
I want our time together to help change what happens outside of therapy.
My approach draws from Emotionally Focused Therapy (EFT), Gottman-informed principles, behavioral science, communication skills, and research and frameworks around love, connection, and relationships.
Together, we might work on:
Recognizing recurring conflict patterns before they take over
Understanding what's really happening underneath an argument
Communicating without immediately becoming defensive, shutting down, or escalating
Understanding how each of you gives and receives love, connection, and appreciation
Expressing needs in ways your partner is more likely to hear
Repairing after conflict instead of letting resentment build
Strengthening friendship, affection, intimacy, and emotional connection
Navigating expectations around money, family, responsibilities, parenting, intimacy, and the life you're building together
There will be plenty of room to talk, process, and understand each other. But we won't stop at insight.
Understanding the fight underneath the fight
Recurring arguments usually aren't just about the dishwasher, the text message, whose turn it was, or exactly what someone said Tuesday night.
There's often something happening underneath.
Maybe one partner reaches harder for reassurance or connection while the other feels criticized and pulls away. The more one pursues, the more the other withdraws—and before long, you're both reacting to each other's reactions.
Instead of spending our time deciding who started it or who's right, we'll slow the pattern down and get curious about what's happening for both of you.
And then we'll work on changing it.
We may practice a difficult conversation in session. I might help you say something differently and have you try it again. We might catch a pattern as it's happening between you or choose something specific to experiment with at home.
Sometimes I'll slow you down. Sometimes I'll point something out. Sometimes I'll challenge both of you to try a different response.
I want what we do in therapy to change what happens when I'm not in the room.
You don't have to wait until something is wrong.
Couples therapy can also be a place to strengthen what's already working and prepare intentionally for what's ahead.
If you're getting married, thinking about having a baby, expecting your first child, or entering another new chapter together, we can talk about some of the things that are much easier to navigate before you're in the middle of them.
That might include communication, money, family boundaries, household responsibilities, intimacy, parenting expectations, how each of you handles stress, and what you want the life you're building together to look like.
For couples preparing for a baby, we'll also have space to think about the shift from being partners to being partners and parents—how you'll share responsibilities, navigate family involvement, approach parenting, and protect your relationship when you're both tired and life suddenly looks very different.
We'll also pay attention to what's already good between you: what brought you together, what you appreciate about each other, how each of you experiences love and connection, and what you want to protect as your relationship changes.
Think of it less as fixing something that's broken and more as getting on the same page before life gets more complicated.
Why I Created The Couples Reset
I was fortunate to receive intensive training in couples work early in my career. For approximately two years, I worked under direct supervision twice a week with experienced couples therapists who listened to my sessions, watched the work unfold, and gave me specific feedback about what I was doing—and what I could do differently.
During that time, I worked with dozens of couples and continued receiving individual supervision and training as I developed my skills. Couples work became something I had a real affinity for, and when I moved into private practice, I went on to work with many more couples.
Eventually, though, I took a break from it.
I found myself increasingly frustrated when couples therapy became an hour of rehashing the argument of the week. I didn't want to simply referee conflict or provide a safe place for couples to argue. I wanted our time together to actually change what happened when they went home.
That break gave me an opportunity to think about what I believed made couples work genuinely useful.
The Couples Reset grew out of that.
My background as both a Licensed Marriage and Family Therapist and Board Certified Behavior Analyst shapes this approach. I'm interested in the emotional experience underneath what's happening between two people, but I'm also naturally curious about what keeps a pattern going and what we might be able to change.
That's why my approach is active, collaborative, and practical. I want you to understand each other more deeply—but I also want you to leave knowing what to do with that understanding.
The goal isn't a perfect relationship.
You're probably not going to leave therapy never disagreeing, never annoying each other, and always knowing exactly the right thing to say.
That's not the goal.
The goal is to know each other better. To recognize when you're getting pulled into an old pattern. To communicate in ways the other person can actually hear. To repair when things go wrong. And to build a relationship that can change and grow along with the two people in it.
It's not about never losing each other. It's about getting better at finding your way back.
Interested in The Couples Reset?
Whether you're feeling stuck, preparing for marriage, getting ready to have a baby, or simply want to be more intentional about your relationship, you don't have to wait until things are falling apart to work on them.
Reach out and mention “Couples Reset.” We can talk about what's bringing you in, what you'd like to work on, and whether my approach feels like a good fit.